Final Post

Here is my final post for the summer. As I sit in my room during preseason for soccer, I am amazed that the summer is actually over but more so, amazed at how the Lord chose to use me.

Reflection:
This summer has been one of intense learning but tons of fun. I can not believe that it is already over but my time at Grabill Missionary Church as a youth intern was a great one. I learned so much from my total experience and can already see how what I have learned will impact my future plans. This internship and practicum were more than I imagined they would be. I had no idea what was planned for me when I walked in May 20th.
A lot of the lessons I learned over the summer were those from failure. The other three interns and myself planned a lot of events and had a lot of room to go very wrong. We had several great ideas and even though they appeared to be infallible, some of them went crazy! I have learned, however, that through failure there are a lot of lessons in ministry that can be learned. I learned that sometimes the kids will have no idea that something went wrong but that does not mean that change should not happen. I also learned that after any kind of event there should be an evaluation period to see what could have been better.
During the first four weeks we were at Grabill, we met with the head pastor Bill Lepley. He took time out of his busy schedule to invest in our lives. Our topic was about leadership and he gave us different exercises and different readings about the topic. I learned a lot from Pastor Bill and wrote several notes while he was talking. He did not have a specific plan each week other than simply talking about his experiences and asking us questions about what we think about ministry through our own experiences. The biggest thing I learned from Pastor Bill is that ministry can not be done alone. He is not a micromanager but does care about each and every program and ministry going on because he knows that without those other facets the church would not function correctly.
Going into this internship, I did not feel called to become a pastor of any kind. Now that the internship is over, I still do not feel like I am called to ministry but I do know that this was confirmed throughout the summer. Although I do not feel like the Lord is calling me into the ministry, I do know that throughout the summer I have fallen more in love with teenagers. I knew that my passion was teens coming in but now that it is over I am so excited to see what the Lord has in mind in the future. The biggest thing this summer I have learned is that God can use even me. Even though I am imperfect, sinful, and selfish, the fact that God chose to use me this summer is completely humbling. I have been stretched and have grown so much because the Lord put me in Grabill, Indiana to work at that church. I have grown spiritually, professionally, and personally in so many ways. This internship was a great tool that I know will come in handy in the future.

WEEK TEN

This week was pretty good...we had our last big event: Summer Camp. We took the youth group to Cedar Point! It was tons of fun even though I don't like roller coasters :) I was able to invest in a lot of kids while we waited in the long lines and sitting aroud the campfire at night. The weekend had its ups and downs (I forgot the hamburgers and hot dots...) but overall was successful. Friday night, I was given the opportunity to talk about my building blocks over the summer and what lessons I am not supposed to forget. It was really impacting to see all the kids begin writing some building blocks of their own and figuring out the lesson(s) that the Lord does not want them to forget about this summer and the past year. I was very encouraged.

There were some struggles with authority this weekend in which I learned a lot about myself and my fellow interns. Although the incident was non involving myself, it was interesting to observe how it played out between the groups. It was just a reminder that there will always be disagreements but the way in which we handle thouse is crucial. Like I said, overall this weekend was great!

These first few days of this week have been so much fun. We have been working little at the office and hanging out with kids a lot! Yesterday, I was able to play soccer with several junior highers and went to a movie with a couple of girls. Today, I am going to another movie with another group of my junior high girls. This has been so much fun investing in these kids lives. Tomorrow night is our last night here and we are having a share night. THe youth pastors want us to take time and talk about what we have learned over the summer. I will be posting my little "talk" as my last post coming up. It is a bittersweet feeling knowing that I am almost done. Sad to leave but excited to see what's up ahead!

Friday, August 3 - 1:30-12:00am...driving to cedar point and being a cabin leader
Saturday, August 4 - Cedar point all day
Sunday, August 5 - Arrived back at church at 12:00pm
Monday, August 6th - 9:40-1:00 planning and cleaning (hanging out with kids in the afternoon and evening)
Tuesday, August 7th - 9:30-12:30 - planning and cleaning (hanging out with kids in the afternoon)

My own personal walk this week was lagging behind but I still felt the Lord's presence. I had an amazing talk with a woman last night that I greatly respect and know that the talk was sent from the Lord. I am learning to begin seeing Him in different ways...like through this woman.

I head for school on Sunday...so I will only be blogging one or two more times!

WEEK NINE

This past week was AMAZING! I was signed up by the two youth pastors to work at a camp all week with several of our 4th - 6th graders. The camp was in Hillsdale, Michigan and is called Camp Michendoh. I absolutely loved it. I have never been a summer camp counselor and I had so much fun! The girls in my cabin were from two different churches and they were great. I did not have any problems with people being mean or cliques...by the middle of the week I couldn't even remember who was from what church. This week was great and spiritually stretching. The speaker was Matt Tucker and did an excellant job. He challenged the kids and then after every chapel (2 times a day) we had what was called "Reality Zone." This was the time when we a counselors got to sit with our cabins and talk about what they were retaining from the talks. I was absolutly amazed at the spiritual understanding that these girls had.
Wednesday night was our "Salvation Night" and 6 of my girls recommitted their lives to Christ and one said she understood it for the first time. I was brought to tears by these girls. Hearing them whisper prayers up to their Heavenly Father was almost too much. I can honestly say that my week would have meat nothing if my girls hadn't gotten anything out of it with eternal purpose.

Sunday: 6:00-9:30 Orientation
Monday: All day training and camper registration
Tuesday: All day
Wednesday: All day
Thursday: All day
Friday: 1:00 was when we were done
Sunday: 8:20-11:30 Sunday school and Church, 3:00-9:30 Crud War Senior High Event

This week has been emotionally draining but totally worth it. Although I maybe didn't have devotion time every single day...I definitely felt close to the Lord. I learned a lot this week about leading others towards Him but getting out of the way. I could sense Him in the worship and during chapel as I was watching my girls jump during the songs. The Lord did some amazing things this week and I have to ask myself why I feel surprised sometimes when He shows up.

This is our last full week of work! It is a bittersweet feeling. We have our last youth group event on Wednesday...so your prayers would be appreciated!

WEEK EIGHT

This week has been absolutely stretching. I have been touched, used, and moved by God and am very excited about it! There have been times this week where I knew the Lord had used me and it was the most amazing feeling and the most humbling experience. There was a time on Sunday in my Sunday school class where I just felt like the kids needed to start hearing about worship and that it is more than just the music...then the worship pastor stressed that in the big service an hour later. It was the Lord using me to prepare those girls' hearts. I am in awe of what He chooses to do through people like me. I am more thankful after experiencing this week to be here in Indiana!

The schedule this week was pretty nice. Two of the interns and one of the youth pastors left after youth group and went on the senior high missions trip while Christian and I stayed behind with the other youth pastor to work.
Thursday, July 12: 10:30 - 3:30 worked on Sunday school lesson
Sunday, July 15: 8:15-11:15 Sunday school and Church
Monday, July 16: 9:00-4:30 Worked on outlines for this week and next week
Tuesday, July 17: 9:30-430 Worked on outlines
Wednesday, July 18: 8:45-? Working on outlines for next week
This will be my last post through next week due to the fact that I am leaving to be a counselor for a week at the 5th and 6th grade summer camp. I was signed up for this as part of my internship and I can not wait! I am so excited knowing that the Lord could use me to change a life this next week! We leave on Sunday and get back on Friday..so I will be posting after I get back from that.

Tonight is youth group and it is my turn to speak. I am very fired up and excited to discuss this battle for the week. We are talking about the battle within our culture. I have noticed so many things in my 2 months of being here and this is one of the weeks that these kids need to hear. Our culture has become so good at getting to kids younger and younger and this church is exhibit A. Anyways, I am excited to speak the truth to these kids tonight and I just pray that they hear it and that it pushes them to change.

Spiritually speaking, this week was outstanding. I felt the Lord more this week than in a long time and it was such an awesome experience. I went and bought a prayer journal and it has been a great asset to my devotional time. Also, I came to a recognition as to why I have been struggling and although I am not completely over this...recognizing it began to set me free. I am so thankful for what the Lord has done in my life this week and can not wait to see what happens in these last 3 weeks here in Grabill.

WEEK SEVEN

This past week has been very stressful. We came back from the youth convention and had just a couple of afternoons to work on our first Sunday school lesson. This part of the job is always stressful for me. Writing a message or a lesson always weighs on my heart and mind until I am completely done with it. I worked hard on my first lesson which was about the Woman at the Well...and it went well! I brought doughnuts in for the kids and we sat and talked about what we could learn from this UnNamed woman in the Bible. This next Sunday, I talk about the sinful woman who anoints Jesus' feet. I am very excited about it and just finished working on it this morning. I really hope the kids begin to understand that even the smallest story in the Bible is put there for a reason and just looking at the "big" Bible stories will not give them the full picture that the Lord wants them to have!

My hours this week were a little crazy as my boss gave me Tuesday off to be with my family since we are going through some major changes. So here it goes:
July 4, 3:00-10:00 (service project at fireworks)
July 5, 9:00-4:30 (working on Sunday school lessons)
July 8, 8:00-11:15 (church) 6:00-9:00 (Senior High event)
July 9, 9:00-10:30 (worked on decorations for our theme), 12:00-4:30 (decorating), 6:30-10:30 (junior high event)
July 11, 2:30-4:45 (decorating for theme), 6:15-8:00 ( youth group)

So my hours were a little mixed up, but this past week was one of learning, frustrations, and growth.

My spiritual life, still has not been where it should be. In all honesty, I hate this paragraph of my blog because I feel like I shouldn't be here at this internship when I have not been spending adequate time with my Lord. It has been one of those things where I feel like all I do in the day is for the Lord so when I actually have a moment of free time I want to do something else. I know this is no excuse but just being honest! I just bought two new journals as I ran out of room in my last one and am excited to see how this tool puts my prayer life back into the top of my priority list.

Overall, I have enjoyed this internship so far. It is not what I expected but I have been learning way more than I ever thought I would. I get frustrated sometimes with how the two youth pastors handle things but have come to grips with the idea that I am only here for 3 months so I'd better stop worrying about how they handle things and start investing more time with the kids. I have been having a blast getting to know the youth group and have found a love for junior high kids. I love their openness and honesty that senior high kids seem to be lacking sometimes. Junior highers seem to still be innocent enough that they are excited to tell you all about them! This is where I am at right now and can't wait to see where this last month here in Grabill, Indiana takes me.

WEEK SIX

I mentioned in my last blog that I would not be able to post last week because I was at a youth convention for the entire week. So, this is my blog that covers that! We left from the church parking lot on Saturday morning (June 23) and drove for 3 hours to get to Calvin COllege where the Missionary denomination has their youth conference. The first three days we were with the Junior high and it was amazing! I was able to have two really in depth conversations with three fringe students...I am excited to connect with them when I see them again at a youth event. THe speaker this week talked about being a revolutionary for Jesus.

The second week was with the Senior high. The speaker of this convention was outstanding. He works with Kingdom Building Ministries and did an excellant job. He talked about different "Why" questions. Why Jesus? Why me? Why CHristianity? It was a great series and the kids seemed to respond really well. Overall, it was a great week...I am very tired :) However, I am anxious to get back and hear at the share night about how the kids are doing with it now. I will be posting again later this week to catch up!

WEEK FIVE

Thursday, June 14
Worked 8:30 - 3:30
I worked in the office until 2:30 this day and then took a couple of girls out for ice cream for the last hour.
Sunday, June 17 Father's Day
8:00-11:15
Sunday school and church
Monday, June 18
12:30-9:00
We had an all youth group event that we had to finish planning and had to set up for all day Monday.
Tuesday, June 19
9:00-4:45
Worked in the office all day, cleaned up from Monday's event, volleyball practice with the kids
Wednesday, June 20
9:00-4:00, 6:15-8:15
Worked on Sunday morning elective sermons and brainstormed for July theme

This week was very stressful! The event on Monday night took up a lot of time and showed me how important planning is. I was very stressed and frustrated on Monday before the event started but once it began at 6:00 it worked out great. The kids didn't even notice some of the things that I noticed went wrong. We played five different crazy games that all were part of a huge competition. After the games were over, they had time to swim in the pond and simply enjoy being together. I am so excited for this next week and am greatly anticipating some awesome conversations to follow. We leave on Saturday morning for the junior high youth convention and the senior high convention starts on Wednesday. The kids are very excited and its been the talk since we arrived here exactly a month ago. So, this week was a learning experience and stressful and next week is going to hopefully be amazing!

To be completely honest, the spiritual side of my life has been struggling. I really do not have an excuse and all I can say is that I am very excited for this youth convention for my own benefit as well as the kids in the youth group!